If, like me, you come from a family of non-achievers who were poor by western standards (Mother was unemployed, Step-Dad earned around £18,000 a year) and had never had a family member go to university (I was the first, and only the second to stay in education until 18), how can you overcome this and rise to actually matter? I am an intelligent person and excellent at my job, but the upper echelons (and even mid-levels) in my company are filled through cronyism and nepotism. The CEO fills the best jobs with his university classmates. The question applies to all fields of life, not only work. How can someone like me rise from the gutter to make what they are worth and realise their full potential?
First thing's first: Stop thinking you are a nobody. This is by far your biggest obstacle. You are somebody. You always have been, you always will be. Measuring your self worth with things like family background, academic credentials, salary, and socio/economic status will always make you feel like you're "in the gutter." You are more than that. Believe it. That said:
Recognize that you are self sufficient. You have already achieved far more than the trust-fund babies that currently occupy the top positions at the company where you work. True, you are not making as much as them right now. But there is a lot to be said for the muscle and skills you developed by having to work your way up and get to where you've gotten now. You have this, they don't. They never will. Nepotism and cronyism are great when the going's good, but it requires them to rely on other people for their success.
Network and make contacts. Be confident in your abilities, and others will see what you see in yourself. If you are intelligent and well-spoken, a smart, savvy person will see past superficial status markers (you mention in your question details) after the first five minutes. Keep in touch and continue to update him/her every so often when you do something good (which you will, because you are a hard worker). If someone doesn't pay attention to you because they don't know your Mommy and Daddy and your kids don't play together, they're not worth your time: don't get insulted, move on.
Develop relationships with people you can trust. If you can find a mentor in someone who is in a higher position than you and recognizes your potential, do so-- he/she will be important in either a) guiding you up the ladder in the company you're currently at, or b) showing you what it takes to rise up at another company, or to create your own!
Continue to work hard and look ahead. Don't let the fact that you didn't start at the top of ladder, with a six-figure salary (all because the CEO's your father's old pal from Princeton and drinks whiskey with him every other Saturday at their favorite country club), distract you. Life isn't fair-- but don't let that deter you. Keep going.
Be kind to yourself. Accept that you will make mistakes and that success will take time. It's trite, but I'll say it: Rome wasn't built in a day. Pace yourself.
First thing's first: Stop thinking you are a nobody. This is by far your biggest obstacle. You are somebody. You always have been, you always will be. Measuring your self worth with things like family background, academic credentials, salary, and socio/economic status will always make you feel like you're "in the gutter." You are more than that. Believe it. That said:
Recognize that you are self sufficient. You have already achieved far more than the trust-fund babies that currently occupy the top positions at the company where you work. True, you are not making as much as them right now. But there is a lot to be said for the muscle and skills you developed by having to work your way up and get to where you've gotten now. You have this, they don't. They never will. Nepotism and cronyism are great when the going's good, but it requires them to rely on other people for their success.
Network and make contacts. Be confident in your abilities, and others will see what you see in yourself. If you are intelligent and well-spoken, a smart, savvy person will see past superficial status markers (you mention in your question details) after the first five minutes. Keep in touch and continue to update him/her every so often when you do something good (which you will, because you are a hard worker). If someone doesn't pay attention to you because they don't know your Mommy and Daddy and your kids don't play together, they're not worth your time: don't get insulted, move on.
Develop relationships with people you can trust. If you can find a mentor in someone who is in a higher position than you and recognizes your potential, do so-- he/she will be important in either a) guiding you up the ladder in the company you're currently at, or b) showing you what it takes to rise up at another company, or to create your own!
Continue to work hard and look ahead. Don't let the fact that you didn't start at the top of ladder, with a six-figure salary (all because the CEO's your father's old pal from Princeton and drinks whiskey with him every other Saturday at their favorite country club), distract you. Life isn't fair-- but don't let that deter you. Keep going.
Be kind to yourself. Accept that you will make mistakes and that success will take time. It's trite, but I'll say it: Rome wasn't built in a day. Pace yourself.
There are over 7 Billion people alive on earth right now. Let's only discuss numbers in terms of one generation otherwise it gets too much for my little brain.
How many 'Somebodies' are there that you can think of? I do not mean Justin Bieber I mean people who have really accomplished something, and the recognition which goes with it.
Let's say that if you tried all day long you may end up with a list with a thousand names on it, now confer with a friend, perhaps you can make 2000 somebodies if you really try and include Jeff from the pub who sings karaoke like a boss.
This means that for every Somebody, there are 3500,000 regular people.
Now I have a sobering thought for you
Everyone is a somebody.....to somebody.
Stop trying to be amazing, stop worrying that you are nobody, lift up your head and ask instead, what can I offer the world?
Do what you love, and remember that you are already an interesting and worthwhile person, whether anyone in particular notices.
You will discover that there are people who notice you, who think you are pretty damn special, and together, you can have a special life, and if you live and die without that special existence ever being on the cover of a magazine, then who gives a fuck.
If you are only interested in being known, then pull your dick out on the bus, that will get you in the papers.
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